The Peanut Butter and Jelly Bomber

On my flight home from a recent trip to New York, I once again encountered the airline security police. The flights to Northwest Arkansas through Chicago would take me directly to a spring break week with my two grandchildren, Caitlyn and Charlie, plus Caitlyn's friend. I put a jar of peanut butter and a jar of jelly into my carry on bag to ensure a quick meal at the cabin where we were staying in Eureka Springs. Evidently, according to my husband, I did not read the "restricted items" list. I admit I did not, but I knew all prescriptions had to be put in clear quart size bags for inspection, all cosmetics had to be in three ounce size bottles. no liquids of any kind would be allowed like bottled water from home, and on and on. I reasoned to myself that peanut butter and jelly were no liquids. Upon removing my vest, jacket, shoes, coins, watch, jewelry, and belt to go through the security line, I heard the dreaded words from one of the officials, "bag check." I saw the next woman put on her plastic gloves and thought, "I wonder what they saw." She immediately took out the peanut butter and jelly and tossed them into a large garbage container where they hit the bottom with a breaking thud. Our homeland security chief Janet appears on television regularly to assure the public that, yes indeed, our rules are being relaxed every day. I am still waiting for good common sense to prevail as an Anglo American grandmother goes through a security line.

Blackberry Moms

I have heard in recent months about the effect of technology on parenting. I have seen scenes on television of children looking longingly at the parent while the parent is using a Blackberry, for example. My own experience into the phenomenon has now been widened to include an actual observance of my daughter and five-year-old grandson in this mode. I was blessed earlier this month to be invited to be a nanny to my grandson in New York City while his mom was on a business trip. I loved New York and the times I shared with Cole, my grandson, for two full weeks. We did all kinds of activities in the city--two children's museums, two zoos, two trips to the famous Toys R Us location in Times Square with the Ferris wheel and roaring T-Rex, a dance on the big piano in FAO Swartz, a fun time at Dylan's Candy Bar, the St. Patrick's Day Parade, the play Mary Poppins, and numerous other experiences. I can't imagine how I would have held a Blackberry and been able to communicate with Cole. My daughter, however, is much better at multi-tasking than I. I first observed her in the backyard patio of the apartment we rented in Brooklyn. The landlords had put in a basketball goal, swing, slide, and play area for their children, Ella and Cole (yes, another Cole). Our Cole loved this area and was able to develop his skills of dribbling and shooting baskets while we were there. On one morning, Kimberly (our daughter) was waiting for an e-mail confirmation. She held her Blackberry in her right hand and shot several baskets with her left hand at the same time. I was amazed. I have also observed her ability to keep three conversations going at once--to her son, to me, and to the Blackberry tweets. Cole even became so interested in this process that, before our time ended in New York, he sent his first e-mail to his mom, knowing that she would read it almost immediately on her Blackberry. I, at this point, am still unsure about the intervention of technology on our parenting roles. Future research will show us whether this will be a positive or negative influence upon our children overall in their development. For me, the jury is still out.

Frugal Fatigue . . . For Sixty Plus Years

I finally discovered the name of a problem this week that I have had for sixty plus years. It was on one of the morning television shows that it was called by name: frugal fatigue. While the name perhaps is new, brought about by the Great Recession of the past two and one-half years, the symptoms have been around forever. It's realizing that one should save money in order to pay bills and certainly not go out and buy a new car, a new house, or take a nice vacation. It's very difficult to live with that notion.

It started for me as the child of a single mother where money was always tight. I used to dream about finding change--quarters, nickels, dimes--in the grass. It was something I yearned for: to have my own money to buy a Coke if I wanted one. Later, as I began earning my own money, again my budget was very tight. After all, I had an apartment to pay for, food to buy, utilities to pay, and insurance premiums to pay. One of the greatest moments of my life occurred when I was nineteen and won a contest promoted by one of the local radio stations. I received $100 to buy some new clothes. It was a dream come true.

After marriage, my husband and I were students at the University of Mississippi in the late 1960's. We were blessed to receive the loans and grants we needed to pay tuition and buy books, but there was little left over for any fun purchases. We also had a new baby girl who needed money for formula, baby food, clothes, doctor, etc. In our thirties, we spent extra money on private school tuition for our two little ones. We sent them to a Christian secondary school for a total of twenty-two years. In addition, I received my doctorate, paying for every hour of education myself. Then came college tuition and expenses for the growing young adults in our family.

Finally, both children were fully educated, and my husband could take additional college classes to work on his CPA. It was then that he was downsized at age 57 from his position at a local hospital. He has now been retired for thirteen years; I have been retired for five. It seems as if, historically, we have always been in a recession in the U. S., which did not help our frugal fatigue either.

The good news is that our family has been healthy, the children have children, the children have good jobs and are taking care of their families, but nonetheless they are also now experiencing frugal fatigue. My daughter has told me through the years that one day she expected me to just leave and live at the foot of Pike's Pike in a cabin alone. She might still be right. Frugal fatigue over a sixty plus period is causing me to consider quite stongly the idea of getting into my 2004 Vibe and driving west with my credit card in tow. After all, I have a few thousand dollars left before my limit is reached.

A Tale of Two Men

We recently learned of the death of physical fitness expert Jack LaLanne who lived to be in his early nineties. Of course, he exercised every day of his life and ate healthy foods. In the day before our society became obsessed with fitness, we used to think he was an oddity. Today, however, we would expect no less of a long life span for Jack.

On the other hand, my father-in-law is still relatively healthy and is also in his nineties. For years his diet was fried chicken and mashed potatoes with gravy every Sunday, bacon and eggs every morning, and lots of fast food carry-outs. He also has a history of heart attacks in his family since his mother and two brothers died of the disease. He has never exercised. Who can determine the lifespan of a man (or woman)? We normally think lifestyle combined with good healthy food will lead to a long life, but he is an anomaly.

But still . . . with our desire to live forever on this earth . . . we continue to do our best to count calories, to cut portions, and to exercise. Who knows . . . perhaps it will truly help to extend our quality of life as we age.

Tucson and "Second Amendment Remedies"

The recent tragedy at Tucson with the killing of six people and the wounding of many others again raises the question of gun control. The Republican senate nominee, Sharron Angle, made headlines during the 2010 campaign with her statement that "second amendment remedies" might be necessary to consider. As I think about the Tuscon tragedy, I have to raise a question that many of us have considered: Would a person with a concealed weapon in the crowd that Saturday morning been able to kill the shooter and lessen the number of people injured or killed? There is always a possibility that more people would have been killed unless the concealed weapon shooter was blessed with a deadly aim for the enemy.

I have been a fan of gun control, and have been for years, since my father was shot three times and killed by a shooter in 1976. Even if I reluctantly agree to keeping some guns on the street in the hands of civilians, I certainly would remove any possibility of purchasing guns with multiple shot capability. While I am not naive enough to believe that insane killers would simply go away, after all they can kill with knives as they do in other countries, I believe limits and extensive background checks would lessen this violence. After all, guns are the weapons of choice in America. Why not work to at least raise the question once again in Congress?

Parallel Universes

Our Spiritual Formation class has been in quite a tizzy lately as we seem to have two groups of people representing two approaches to theology. One is the atheistic-scientific-humanist philosophy that wants to weigh and measure all things spiritual, i. e. if one cannot see or prove the event through history, then it must be metaphorical or symbolic. Another is the philosophy of faith believing that it is "the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen." I believe we simply live in a world of parallel universes.

The discussion has been ongoing for the five years we have participated in this class. The atheistic-scientific-humanist group is not convinced that eternal life is a possibility, that Jesus was both divine and human (perhaps they say he was the son of a Roman soldier), that there was likely no Resurrection, and that Jesus was not born in Bethlehem, that there was no census to bring Mary and Joseph there. It believes Jesus was simply a victim of the evil Roman Empire and that God never intended to send Him as a sacrifice for the sins of humanity.

The other group believes in the Truth of the Bible, but of course gives credence to the idea that the Bible does speak and teach through many parables and many metaphors. Essentially, this group believes in miracles and that God indeed does intervene in the affairs of the world. It believes that the Bible was written by humans but by those who were inspired by God. How can the two views be reconciled?

The Episcopal Church states a theology based upon reason, tradition, and the Bible, yet it seems that in some circles reason is becoming the dominant tenet of the church. My question is this: If God does not interfere in the affairs of humankind, why should one bother to pray, to attend church, or even to attempt to live a moral life? On the other hand, if we believe in answered prayer and seek to live as Jesus lived--loving God and loving our neighbors, are we not better people? Do we not have hope not only for this Kingdom on earth but also for the eternal Kingdom ahead? I choose to believe in the philosophy of faith. While I have only anecdotal evidence (much of it) of the presence and working of God in my life through the past sixty plus years, it is enough. I am not convinced the parallel universes will ever come together.

"I've Grown Old"

After recently viewing the new version of True Grit, I have realized how quickly the years have gone by since I saw the original version with John Wayne. It was 1969, and my husband and I were college students at the University of Mississippi. We had a one-year-old daughter and were still in our twenties. The world "so various, so beautiful, so new" lay before us. Having grown up in underclass, or nearly so, households, we were excited about the move into the middle class with all its possibilities. Now, some forty plus years later, I can identify with the latest view of life from the 2010 version of the film. Rooster Cogburn runs across the landscape near the end of the film carrying Mattie Ross in his arms. Time is of the essence since she has been bitten by a poisonous snake. He exclaims, "I've grown old." So have we all.

Since we are just a few days into 2011, the time is always ripe for setting new goals and resolutions. I am proud to say that I have kept quite a few of my last year's plans: to lose weight (forty-three pounds last year), to write down a "quietly joyful moment" each day of the year, and to love and see my family more. The year just past was a good one. We enjoyed a great trip to Seattle and to Victoria, B.C. to see our daughter and grandson last June. We were able to be together as a family for a short week along with our son and two grandchildren from Little Rock.

This year I want to continue my resolutions from 2010 but also add a few more. I want to write more stories and poems. I have been blessed to read two pieces recently on NPR's "Tales from the South" program, and I hope to submit more for consideration. I want to pursue getting my novel published, which has essentially sat in a drawer since I completed it in 2004. I have realized that even at age sixty-six that one's productive years do not have to be over.

Yes, the years do go by so quickly. I always remember the old adage though that it's not the number of years one has but the quality that's important. I hope to live life to the utmost in the time I have remaining--before the next version of True Grit.